I very much want to go. But given our current relationship. I'm not sure. He's an idiot! He says I didn't put in effort! He says I've changed. Bullshit. What never put effort? V'day nv surprise you means nv put effort? Then things happening everyday not effort? When you stop calling me in the noons, I make the effort to call you. When you're working, I make the effort to go down to look for you. You work Queensway eh. You know how far is that anot. Take cab need $10 eh. Take train+bus need 1 hour eh. You think not tiring ar? You think everyday I sit at home and shake leg ar? I also got work to do eh. You think sit in front of the computer not tiring ar? It's tiring ok. I'm suffering from ultra shoulder aches, you know a not. Complain you got fever I don't know. You don't say, how I know? You except me to call you every hour to ask if you are feeling well is it? Our relationship has been like that all along. Why do you suddenly expect me to change. Effort is every day make one hor. You think only on special occassions?? Last Monday so tired, I only slept for 4 hours the previous night. But I make the effort to come find you after the competition. In the end what I get. One big black face. You think how I feel. You said that I did not care about your feelings. Then did you consider my feelings? You work, I also got work. Can't we take turns to look for each other? Can't you come down to my place once in a while? I bet you don't believe when I told you that I went to the nail school last week right, and you don't believe when I said I go movies with my family, and shopping with Tiffany right? Everything I say now, you have your doubts right. Then say so la. Why must you say you believe me. I'm very tired. Everything I do, I got to worry that you think otherwise. If you give me sian face every time we meet, you think I still want to meet a not? Then you say that I say you never give me freedom. This is not about "freedom". It's about respect and trust. Friends is friends, girl or guy also friends. Even if I go out with guy friends so what? SO WHAT? Eat, and talk, and watch show. That's what every one's doing. Not as if I'm kissing, and hugging and sleeping with him. Why must you insult me, and insult yourself. It's ridiculous, no? When I told you I'm going Sentosa with Huiying and Tiff, you confirm die die also think that there'll be guys. Then not happy that I want to go. Then you might as well send me to an island. This is not "freedom" ok. It's stupid! Grow up! We're in our 20s already. Stop behaving like a kid who refuses to share his toy! And I'm not your toy. I'm a person.
14:47 - OK I'm back from lunch.
I haven't say finish. Yesterday you wanted silver marker from EDC to sign your parka. I walked all the way to Popular to buy for you. Raining heavy like hell. And when you needed to transfer money to that Malaysia guy, I went all the way to Maybank to get it done for you. I helped you with so much things. You still say I never contribute to this relationship. I haven't been of help to you? And every time you say something, I tell you my view, or when I defend myself from your assumptions, you insist that I'm arguing with you. I'm not. If I keep my mouth shut, then I'll be accussed for nothing right. If it's wrong, shouldn't I have the right to fight back? And if I have a different view/opinion from you, means I'm arguing? I'm your girlfriend, but that doesn't mean that I have to agree with you ALL the time! You ask yourself, did I ever forbid you from going out with your friends, did I accuse you of going out with girls? When you go pub with your friends, and girls talk to you, did I get angry? When you get drunk, did I hate you? When you receive v'day gift from another girl, or when you smoke once in a while, or when you play MJ overnight? Not that I don't care, it's because I trust and believe that you will not misbehave. What I don't know won't kill me anyway. And you think you give me roses and card for v'day v.big ar? Together for 4 years already, it's the first time you gave me such a "big" bouquet. So stop harping, as if you've done soooo much. It's not. Every tom, dick and harry's gf on the streets are carrying bouquets of roses. So it's part of your duty as a bf. OKAY?
You're selfish, period.
You tell me your defination of EFFORT. Then I tell you if I've made the effort.
- Main Entry:
- ef·fort
- Pronunciation:
- \ˈe-fərt, -ˌfȯrt\
- Function:
- noun
1 : conscious exertion of power : hard work effort>
2 : a serious attempt :tryeffort to reduce costs>
3 : something produced by exertion or tryingeffort>
4 : effective force as distinguished from the possible resistance called into action by such a force
5 : the total work done to achieve a particular endeffort>
2 : a serious attempt :try
3 : something produced by exertion or trying
4 : effective force as distinguished from the possible resistance called into action by such a force
5 : the total work done to achieve a particular end
Suddenly, I hate this word.
